Profilectlx.Carlene Tan Li Xuan 11th July 1988. Currently 23+. Studied in St. Anthony's Canossian Primary and Secondary School, SRJC (first 3 months), TPJC, NUS FASS (econs). loves family, friends, chocs, western desserts, yellow, etc etc.
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Wednesday, September 29, 2004i am going crazy. i hate myself.i cried today, again. i cried over my ss paper. i failed. i scored 22 out of 50. i wonder what kind of miracles can happen in order for me to pass my only humanities. i really wonder. the world around me seems to collapse. i hate myself, not the world. i hate myself for being such a failure, for not being able to score good grades, for not being able to accomplish so many so many things. i hate myself for so many numerous reasons i can't count. why? why can't i lean on anyone. the people i once used to lean on or i thought could be my support are no longer there for me. i can't turn to those i once used to because they too are trying to find someone. i hate myself for not being independent enough. i remember what morris said in "tuesdays with morris". "We depend on people when we were infants, we depend on people when we're dying. But in between, we depend on people more." now i'm starting to doubt that statement. will there always be someone you can depend on during your darkest days? In the end, don't you actually have to fall back on yourself? why is it i can never do anything right, i can never live a month not shedding tears of unhappiness. i'm unhappy, does anyone know? does anyone care? when mrs.lopez flashed the ss marks on the visualizer today, and i saw my doom, i was davestated. i cried. i couldn't cry aloud because i didn't want to get attention. i really tried fighting back my tears, i really tried to be strong. i wanted to look for something to relieve this pain, i wanted to slash myself so deep till i feel numb. i'm sick, sick in the head, i'm going crazy. i've told many never to self mutilate cause it won't work. i've told many to look on the bright side of life. i've cheered up many, i've advised them, even guided them in someways or other, but why can't i guide myself now? why can't i tell myself to stop self pitying? why can't i tell myself it's not the end? why? why? why? i don't want anyone who read this entry to worry bout me, i just need somewhere to pour out too and here's where i do it. i don't hate the world, the world owes me nothing, nobody does, i owe this all to myself, and so i hate myself. honestly, since mid-year, i've improved, but so what, i still can't reach what i expected, and more so, what my parents want. i wonder when i can ever appease them, wonder when i can ever make them proud to say they have a daughter like me, wonder when they will ever say "good job". i wonder when i can be that normal happy-go-lucky self of me again. Saturday, September 25, 2004Grad night was yesterday!!! Everyone looked so pretty!!! It’s just like everyone went for a make over, especially my xue ling… hehe… if you want to see, you can go see si hui’s blog, try spotting any of us. Well, honestly it seemed as if everyone went for an extreme makeover. Cool yae… haha. Okay so now let me give you a detailed recount of what happened. :)
Tuesday, September 21, 2004shoe shopping! that's where i went with cindy today. Before that went to get contacts with xueling, and ya planning to tell a white lie to my mum. so anyway today just isn't my day, let me rant... =)first, my last paper totally sucked. It was crappy, though easier than the first paper, still, i hardly survived... *sticks out tongue* but anyway its over! OVER OVER OVER! hehe... carried numerous tables and chairs back to the classes, i think we literally lost a few hundred grams just by doing so, so anyone keen on losing weight, carry tables and chairs!!! *smirks* so went home, spent $12 on contacts, i owe xue ling $4, $30 to my dad for my handphone bills, $56 odd to my mum for shoes, 2 pairs mind you, now this leads me to what happened today. today, cindy and i walked from far east, to tangs, to some shopping center beside that to taka, then walked to suntec, and found NOTHING! i was damn desperate already, cause for one, i can't go back empty handed. So while heading back to city hall mrt station, we went into marina square, and i found shoes!!! $12.90!!! nice nice, got this little jewel somemore... ;) oh saw my dear friend mag and a many few other sacians as orchard, suppose they were all looking for gowms. so wore it immediately, cause ya, that was actually what me and cindy was planning to do, walk in heels, as in practice, and i tell you the shoes got a very good taste of me, don't know bite me how many zillion times... now both sides of my ankle skin is torn... *grits teeth* okay now for the best part... i was walking home real daintily, walking with poise and elegance :) and ya, when i entered the lift and was about to admire my now shoes, i realised... 1 jewel dropped out!!!! dropped out!!! can you believe my luck!!! i tell you i nearly wanted to tear my hair, what turned out to be my "lucky day" went totally haywire... haish... haish... why why why... so tried really hard to find back that jewel but to no avail... :( so my whole family went to east point for dinner in which we didnt actually eat there cause we just went to pedleworks and spent another $36 on yet another pair of slip-ons... :X... can't say how guilty i felt, even until now... i don't know, but in me, there's just this super large extent of love and respect for my mum but yet when she starts yelling at me, i just go all bongus and all these sweet things she does for me just slips off my mind... stupid me. anyway i'm still planning to pay her back so ya. you know this kinda love-hate relationship is just so sickening... really irritating... and what's worse, it always happens, especially to me... * grinds teeth* haish, but what to do, life is just like that ain't it... just wish i could be more "da liang"(paiseh, don't know the eng word) hehe... anyway things are just going on so fast i can hardly catch up. The most unexpected things just happen at the wrong time.... i... i'm at a lost for words right now, so shall end here. take care everyone. **i would like to give special thanks tp SI HUI for helping me change my template... THANK YOU! and special thanks to my UNSWORNIE SWORNIE SISTA for spending her time with me today... and to my KAOLA BEAR for you know why... and and XUE LING for always helping mar fan me... :) luv u pple soooooo very much *muacks*! "Just missed the train" by Kelly Clarkson Roll over baby, the time has cometo make a little bit more room I've hung around you, it's getting tough I think I'm gonna break down soon ‘Cuz I remember, crying in the park, it was getting dark Suddenly I looked up You were my sky So go on and Sleep darling Why don't you pretend we were just a dream It's cool babyIt doesn't matter anywayI'm so sorry Got to the station a little too late Such a shame Just missed the train Be quiet angel, don't make a sound Save it for a rainy day Oh can't you see me, I'm such a mess trying hard to find my way Do you remember, wasting all that time, we were feeling fine Though we couldn't walk a line We were alright Chorus Oh, why'd that train just pass us by Didn't anyone see We were stuck at the light Or we would've made it on time Chorus (2x) Friday, September 17, 2004"Without you" by kelly clarksonNo I can't forget this evening Nor your face as you were leaving But I guess that's just the way the story goes You always smile But in your eyes, your sorrow shows Yes it shows I can't liveIf living is without you I can't live I can't give anymore I can't live I f living is without you Can't live Can't give anymore Well I can't forget this evening Nor your face as you were leaving But I guess that's just the way the story goes You always smile But in your eyes, your sorrow shows Yes it shows Can't live If living is without you Can't live I can't give anymore Can't live If living is without you I can't live Can't give anymore Noo No no no no I can't live pple, you should try downloading this song, its really lovely, gotta give credits to si hui for introducing this song really, now i'm stuck to it... hehe... old song lar i know, but its really soothing, especially when you hear the song... >> hey girl, i know you care about me, i know you want things to turn out okay between me and her, but i don't want you involve because i don't want you to be stuck in the middle. i don't know if you still remembered what happened in primary 6. i literally lost a friend because of you, do you know? i think not, well it doesn't really matter now, its the past, i really don't blame you, i believe your intentions were good, and i believe it now too. i really don't want you hurt, and what's worse, the friendship between the both of you to be strained. i see the both of you happy together, and that's what makes me more determined to keep things going, and pick up and learn. i truly appreciate your help, i do. i hope whatever i say here won't affect you in anyway, cause that's not my intention. i want you to be HAPPY. okay? happy happy happy. i think you've gone through even sad stuff, now its your turn to be happy and cheerful. i'm glad you know what you're doing now. thank you for all your help. luv ya! *muacks* << ** i wonder what you said in your blog is for me. i don't expect anything, i can't and i don't have the right to. i really wonder why we suddenly become so strained, why? maybe its just me, no i think it is just me. i'm just doubting this friendship, wanna know why? cause its 1-sided. i'm always the 1 asking the question. a basic friendship is 2 way. if i ask you how are you, you should do the same right? but do you realise you don't? mayb its just me, maybe i'm too sensitive, but do you know i'm trying to be less senitive. i may be expecting too much from you so you can't stand me. don't worry. you won't get anymore of it. no matter what the outsome might be, i just hope that your friendship with her won't end. keep that love of friendship going ya... i shall just fade away. =)** "I need you" by Leann Rimes I don't need a lot of things I can get by with nothin' With all the blessings life can bring I've always needed something But I've got all I want when it comes to lovin' you You're my only reason, you're my only truth Chorus: I need you like water, like breath, like rain I need you like mercy from Heaven's gate There's a freedom in your arms, that carries me through I need you(whoa-oh) You're the hope that moves me to courage again (oh yeah) You're the love that rescues me when the cold winds rage And it's so amazin' 'cause that's just how you are and I can't turn back now 'cause you've brought me too far (Chorus) Oh, yes I do, oh I need you like water, like breath, like rain I need you like mercy from Heaven's gate, There's a freedom in your arms, yeah, that carries me through I need you Oh, yes I do I need you oh, oh, oh I need you, oh-oh Thursday, September 16, 2004hey peeps! i'm back! as in CARLENE is back to update her blog! yuppie... man, i won't say my unswornie swornie sister didn't do a good job but i felt it just doesn't sound at all like me... right right? but anyway i still gotta thank my unswornie swornie sister for that extra effort... thank you darling... *muacks!*so ya, just now was doing a.math with si hui, did for a short while only lar, cause was busy eating and ya... hehe... so now i'm online... and si hui's here too! was really worried just now that she'd lost her way... listening to accidentally in love by counting crows now, its a cool song... =) damn, i just bashed my whole shoulder against the wall... i think its swollen now... heck, still won't hurt as much as my head or heart... so far, my papers just suck, its terrible, bad, horrible... i wonder if i can even pass really... haish... how i wish i can just get a heart attack now and die... save all the problems... haish... anyway since i'm here to update it myself, i might as well clear this misunderstanding that everyone has... the msg i typed for the last time isn't for my koala bear k... don't misunderstand, there's nothing wrong between us now... =) well ya, listening to "accidentally in love" by counting crows now... really nice... thanks baby piggy... love ya too! *muacks!* k then... 3 more papers for me... go everyone! we're finishing prelims soon! jai you jia you! **hey... erm, you know, i thought i'd see you happier, but erm, i'm not sure i do, you seem to have quieten down a lot. what's wrong? are you okay? well i got a piece of good news to tell you... i'm don't depend on you as i once did already, which means i'm gonna talk to you real soon, though i don't know why now i still find it really hard to talk to you like how we use to. i want things back to how they were. it's not your fault things are this way, it's just my stupidity... so ya, but i hope you don't misunderstand me, i really only treat you as a really good friend, someone i can trust, nothing else. i really treasure this friendship, i wonder if you do? actually i think you don't even know who you are, or better still, even realise that i'm ignoring you in some ways... but oh well... it's better anyway... i'm planning, as in planning to clear things up after my prelims, whether or not i'll be ready by then, i'm not sure, but i'm trying hard to... =) i want you to know that you still can look for me if you're upset, if you're angry over something, i want you to know i'll be there for you, okay? honestly, i hate to see a friend upset... so ya... do cheer up k... see ya soon!** "Accidentally in love" by Counting Crows So she said what's the problem baby What's the problem I don't know Well maybe I'm in love (love) Think about it every time I think about it Can't stop thinking 'bout it How much longer will it take to cure this Just to cure it cause I can't ignore it if it's love (love) Makes me wanna turn around and face me but I don't know nothing 'bout love Come on, come on Turn a little faster Come on, come on The world will follow after Come on, come on Cause everybody's after love So I said I'm a snowball running Running down into the spring that's coming All this love melting under blue skies Belting out sunlight Shimmering love Well baby I surrender To the strawberry ice cream Never ever end of all this love Well I didn't mean to do it But there's no escaping your love These lines of lightning Mean we're never alone, Never alone, no, no Come on, Come on Move a little closer Come on, Come on I want to hear you whisper Come on, Come on Settle down inside my love Come on, come on Jump a little higher Come on, come on If you feel a little lighter Come on, come on We were once Upon a time in love We're accidentally in love Accidentally in love Accidentally in love Accidentally in love Accidentally in love Accidentally in love Accidentally in love Accidentally in love Accidentally I'm In Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, Accidentally I'm In Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, I'm in Love, Accidentally Come on, come on Spin a little tighter Come on, come on And the world's a little brighter Come on, come on Just get yourself inside her Love... I'm in love Tuesday, September 14, 2004(Note: Whee~ Cindy here! Carlene's VERY beloved Unswornie Swornie Sister!Hahaha...hmm...just two things to say, I'm the one updating this entry since she's...well...on the phone talking to moi...haha...carlene, you've really got to treat me lunch next time for making me do all these even if it is a weekday...Haha, I shan't say I rock because I'm not as thick skinned as SOME people. :D Haha...whee! Looking forward to next Tuesday!!Let's wear high heels and fall together!)Hey, people! So sorry if i shocked all of you this morning with my wierd behaviour. Please don't worry about me, i'm fine. ('',) i decided to put up this message because i want to clear the misunderstanding that everyone has in mind. And i want to clear Koala Bear's name by writing this: the message below is NOT for Koala Bear. This message goes to someone else and if the person ever knows who she is or she suspects that she is the person whom the message is to, please tell me. **i'm really glad to have known you, no regrets honestly, just that the saddest thing happened and that is i'm depending on you too much, i'm sure you don't notice so ya i've decided to take time off and just leave things to cool off for a moment, or at least let me cool off for some time, sure the only way i'm gonna do it is to not talk to you as much as before, but no worries! i'll get over it soon, i hope, unless of course, you find it disgusting and ya, not want to carry on this friendship, then i'll leave it as that too. but for the time being, i think we're both fine the way we are, after all you are happy and its good to see that, you also have many dependable friends so i don't think i mean much, ya? good, so that's basically all i've got to say. At least i've pen down my thoughts and i do feel much more relieved now. So at least when whatever happens later on, i have this to fall back on. ** Monday, September 13, 2004hey peeps! i'm home already... jealous? hehe... oh anyway i've got good news... *grinz*if you did read my last entry, i typed somthing bout depending on this friend of mine too much... this morning, xue ling said it was obvious, and when she told me who she thought it was, it was WRONG! =( so ya, which lead me to think that this msg may cause people to misunderstand me, so if you think you're whoever i'm talking about, PLEASE TELL ME... i really don't want any misunderstandings... okay? good. so now the good news... i'm not dependent on her anymore!!!! =D i'm sure you'll all shout for joy for me... right? hehe. now everything should go back to normal... though at times it still hurts a little, but then, i've learnt to stand on my own too feet... good ya? =) well back to yesterday. yesterday, me, si hui, mei yi and my sis went to esplanade to watch the show my drama center was putting up. it was cool, the kids were absolutely lovely, the parents were super supportive, and at the end, the parents did a surprise performance by singing the song "stay the same" by Joey McIntyre. its was lovely. The kids were told to go up and give a big hug to their mummies and daddies. That sight moved me to tears, well i didn't actually cry, but ya. its was touching. come to think of it, i've never hugged my parents before, anyway they'll think of it was disgusting. so ya. Back to the point, i think family love is really powerful, it stands by all obstacles, no matter what disaster comes, it's always family and true friends who are there. so ya, bascially, i just wanna share in this entry that song "stay the same" and a few other songs i found really lovely... so enjoy! P.S You can erm, ask me how to sing them, but preferablly someplace without glass... hehe ;) "Stay the same" by Joey McIntyre [Chorus] Don't you ever wish you were someone else, You were meant to be the way you are exactly. Don't you ever say you don't like the way you are. When you learn to love yourself, you're better off by far. And I hope you always stay the same, cuz there's nothin' 'bout you I would change. [Verse] I think that you could be whatever you wanted to be If you could realize, all the dreams you have inside. Don't be afraid if you've got something to say, Just open up your heart and let it show you the way. [Chorus] [Bridge] Believe in yourself. Reach down inside. The love you find will set you free. Believe in yourself, you will come alive. Have faith in what you do. You'll make it through. [Chorus] Yup, meaningful eh? i suppose this song will hit anyone who have tried many a times to change themselves to suit others. This song is telling you DON'T change yourself because you want to be accepted. Be youself and you'll find that surrounding you, will be you true friends... ************************************************** "Before your love" by kelly clarkson I wonder how I ever made it through the day How did I settle for a world in shades of gray? When you go in circles all the scenery looks the same And you don't know how And I looked into your eyes With the world stretched out in front of me and I realized I never lived before your love I never felt before your touch I never needed anyone to make me feel alive But then again, I wasn't really living I never lived before your love I wanted more than just an ordinary life All of my dreams seemed like castles in the sky I stand before you when my heart was in your hands And I don't know how I survived without your kiss 'Cause you've given me a reason to exist I never lived before your love I never felt before your touch I never needed anyone to make me feel alive But then again, I wasn't really living I never lived I never lived before your love I never lived before your love And I don't know why Why the sun decides to shine But you breathed your love into me just in time I never lived before your love I never felt before your touch I never needed anyone to make me feel alive But then again, I wasn't really living I never lived I never lived before your love *************************************************** "In the arms of an angel" by Sarah McLachlan Spend all your time waiting for that second chance for a break that would make it okay there's always some reason to feel not good enough and it's hard at the end of the day I need some distraction oh beautiful release memories seep from my veinslet me be empty and weightless and maybeI'll find some peace tonight in the arms of the angelfly away from here from this dark cold hotel room and the endlessness that you fear you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie you're in the arms of the angel may you find some comfort here so tired of the straight line and everywhere you turn there's vultures and thieves at your back and the storm keeps on twisting you keep on building the lies that you make up for all that you lack it don't make no difference escaping one last time it's easier to believe in this sweet madness oh this glorious sadness that brings me to my knees in the arms of the angelfly away from here from this dark cold hotel room and the endlessness that you fear you are pulled from the wreckage of your silent reverie you're in the arms of the angelmay you find some comfort here you're in the arms of the angelmay you find some comfort here ********************************************************** nice old song ya? =) well peeps, gotta gp study! enjoy your day! Thursday, September 09, 2004Hey diary, I’m back! But today with a more serious tone, cause this entry contains of things which are meaningful to me, and I hope to the rest who reads it. This entry will be one I won’t forget cause I know deep down, there are a lot of emotions planted in here, emotions of which I cannot understand, too many mixed feelings, too much hurt, confusion, and yet I found that enlightenment, which I know will carry me through this trying period.Just now, I was sitting at this place around my tuition center, waiting for my parents to pick me. I looked around me and felt the gush of wind sweep across my face and felt really at ease. Before that, and during the whole of my tuition, I could hardly concentrate cause my mind was on many other complicated stuff, things I really couldn’t comprehend. I was bewilded by the peace and tranquility of the night, as I looked around, I saw couples, families and friends having the most precious times together, I could feel that deep love and care each and everyone had for each other. I saw colleges of “Giant” gathered outside, laughing and talking. Beside me sat a father and a son, and none of them breathe a word, but still there was love. The power of the simplest things like spending quiet times together amazed me, it was the love, family and friendship that brings us forth day after day, giving us that motivation to move on. Isn’t that just wonderful? Today, I learnt a lesson on how to let go. Its funny how our minds work, don’t you think? Sometimes, new people, new things appear in our lives and we face and handle these many different things differently, as we go along, we start to predict how these new relationships and friendships will turn out to be. Some of which we know will turn out to be real hurtful, but yet we just continue to keep this relationship, in hope that all will turn out well. Unfortunately, this relationship is one-sided, its not a 2-way thing and therefore, it will not last. And sadly, as expected, the relationship ends with 1 party getting hurt, and the other either not knowing what was going on, or not bothering at all. Its weird how people, although knowing the outcome still go all out for it, and that’s exactly what I did. Its really stupid I know, its dumb. I’ve seen so many of my close friends go through this before me yet I didn’t bother learning from them, and great, now I’m in that position. Its really sickening. I hate myself for it, I seriously do. Jeez, I hope I’ll be like the last to in my group of friends to undergo this torture, honest, its really pure mental torture, trust me, you won’t want to try. So as I was saying, its difficult to let go really, especially when you’ve grown to depend on that person, but then coming back to the base of it all, that person really isn’t yours so its simply impossible to keep that person, right? So ya, let go… =). Cindy’s talking to me now and I’m gonna quote what she quoted from somewhere, “I believe we meet everyone for a reason.” I believe in that too, I believe I met this very person cause she’s gonna make me grow stronger. How bout yours? Sometimes, I wish I just knew how to hide my feelings, just have this poker face so I’d make things pleasant for everyone. But no, I don’t, how I wish how I wish the pain will just leave right now. But then I realize, life isn’t all about me, I start thinking about the people in the hospital, those bulging eyes of the family members who cried till they didn’t have any more tears left, I thought about what kind of pain they were going through, and then looked back at mine only to realize how insignificant that is, only to realize how precious life is. There’s no point self-blaming for whatever has happened, cause what was meant to happen will happen, how about instead look forward and think of ways to make life more bearable, more pleasant and most of all, how to pick up and learn. That’s an important life lesson I learnt today. Sure its not easy to let go, it needs a lot of patience, time and tears, but at the end of it all, its worth the effort, cause it’ll only make you stronger. So I’m on my journey with my group of friends going through what I am now, I know I’ll make it cause of my wonderful friends and their unfailing support, I know I’ll make it cause I know they won’t ever give up on me, and I trust them with my heart and soul. I thank God deeply for their presence, I really won’t know what to do if I hadn’t had them by my side. Thank you all of you for being there in my darkest moments, and I’d like to give special thanks to my unswornie swornie sista who never fails to teach me important lessons of life and make me more mature. Thank you people so much. Luv ya always. this entry brought me to think of a song. When i first heard the song, i didn't like it cause i couldn't make any sense out of it, but then after deep reflection and looking into the real meaning of the song, i think it applies really well to how i feel, so here it is. I used to think I had the answers to everything But now I know Life doesn't always Go my way, yeah... Feels like I'm caught in the middle That's when I realize... (Chorus) I'm not a girl Not yet a woman All I need is time A moment that is mine While I'm in between (Verse 2) I'm not a girl There is no need to protect me Its time that I Learn to face up to this on my own I've seen so much more than u know now So tell me to shut my eyes I'm not a girl Not yet a woman All I need is time A moment that is mine While I'm in betweenI 'm not a girl But if u look at me closely You will see it my eyes This girl will always find Her wayI'm not a girl(I'm not a girl don't tell me what to believe) Not Yet a woman(I'm just tryin to find the woman in me, yeah) All I need is time (All I need) A moment that is mine (That is mine) While I'm in between I'm not a girl Not yet a woman All I need is time (is All I need) A moment that is mine While I'm in between I'm not a girl Not yet a woman meaningful song eh? =) this is a msg for someone i have depended on, erm... i hope whoever i'm writing to isn't obvious, cause i don't wanna make anyone feel uncomfortable or anything, but i'm still gonna type it cause this is after all just my diary... to this friend: i'm really glad to have known you, no regrets honestly, just that the saddest thing happened and that is i'm depending on you too much, i'm sure you don't notice so ya i've decided to take time off and just leave things to cool off for a moment, or at least let me cool off for some time, sure the only way i'm gonna do it is to not talk to you as much as before, but no worries! i'll get over it soon, i hope, unless of course, you find it disgusting and ya, not want to carry on this friendship, then i'll leave it as that too. but for the time being, i think we're both fine the way we are, after all you are happy and its good to see that, you also have many dependable friends so i don't think i mean much, ya? good, so that's basically all i've got to say. At least i've pen down my thoughts and i do feel much more relieved now. So at least when whatever happens later on, i have this to fall back on. erm... if its obvious who i'm talking about, PLEASE TELL ME!!! well certainly my unswornie swornie sister will know who i'm referrring to, but ya... =) take care everyone! Tuesday, September 07, 2004okay... so i'm back again... today but browless. as in my gosh, my brows been trimmed! till there's nearly nothing! argh!!! okay but then again, its erm...now why don't i start from the beginning, from the early morning, went down for breakfast with my mum, bro and sis. there was basically a nursery running at the florist shop, so many many many kids... jeez and all the noise... so after tt i recieved a call from cindy telling me she's arriving so i had to walk out all the way to the bus stop cos this girl just had a terrible sense of direction so ya... so we went over to macs, cin got her meal and ya, ate and study... then i recieved a msg from si hui saying she'll be late cos her tuition's ending late... so ya, we waited and waited, and ta-da! she appeared! hehe, we actually were erm.. planning to do some stuff but i have decided nto to mention tt part.... might get hacked off soon... so ya... so anyway we just had a lil amusement teasing si hui, and ya she was super stress... oh! i wrote an episode of "SEE HUEE'S MYSTERY STORIES" on one of the servietts provided and ya she kopt it in her history text... wanna see it go look for her... hehe so actually the best part was at the hair dressers, si hui and my sis went off first while me and cindy waited for mei yi, who was being a one day "servant"... so we went over to the house only to find si hui trimming her eye brows... it was hilarious, we kept asking if it hurt and everything... so ya, but it didn't lar... so i got mine trimmed too, looks bad... i got my hair trimmed too, it was cheap, $7, not bad right, my sis lost the most hair, she was erm... half excited half horrified at ther amount of hair she lost.... so quite funny. then had to rush home once i was done cos i was like 110% sure i was gonna get scolding, but then guess what, when i reached home, NOTHING it was FINE! hehe... so now i'm talking to cindy bout some sstuf, sheesh, i hope all those teasing won't lead to anything undesirable, so ya... i hope whoever i tease really tell me when something goes wrong... cos i'm just blur... sad to say... but ya... that's all for the browless episode in angelic pig's entry! be sure to read the next episode! tata! Friday, September 03, 2004okay. you know something. today is INTERESTING! and EVENTFUL for CINDY!!! haha! haha! well i will try my utmost best to paint a vivd picture of what actually happened, but for a more detailed one, pls read cindy's blog.. haha!okay before the story, let me rant about the social studies prelim paper today. i think and i honestly feel that i might fail this paper again. you know why? cause ALL the essay questions came out on topics i didn't study. clever of me ya, i know. i'm so bloody doomed i just crapped my way through my essay questions. i'm DEAD. okay so ya went to cindy's house after dropping by the coffee shop and i ate a pao. so like i said went to cin's house and man she took VERY long to get ready. i was already rotting there... okay then afterward we went to my house. i took a shower, packed and off the macs we went. now here's the story. read carefully. we sat at a table near the window. everything went well for the first half of the early afternoon, until this group of teenage smokers about our age sat at the table directly outside our window. duh it was uncomfortable and cin mentioned about a guy who kept staring in. so i told her to ignore him and ya, blamed her for attracting these guys to the window. so she retaliated by saying no one could be attracted to her, not when she's having a pimple breakout. so she blamed it on me, but then again i had my perfect reasons. then a few mins later, this lower sec guy banged on our window and pointed to cindy than to his friend and phone i think. man this part was the best. cin actually battered her eye lids! haha! but it was subconsiously lar. haha! it was hilarious, i was really trying hard not to laugh. so ya, cin ignored him and guess wad. he actually came INTO macs, CAME to our table and asked for cin's number for his friend! haha! cin said a straight NO... aw.. so sad but ya, the guy was uh-hm.... *no comments* so i thought of an idea bout pretending cin already has a stead but she just won't say it cos.. its a lie and ya its sinful etc. so yes i decided then she should change the words at the front of the phone from "luv ya" to "i love -" so we did! and i was trying means and ways to tell cindy to act so as to adjust the phone near the window to allow those people to see etc. but erm. i don't think it worked. now for the third time! they banged on the window AGAIN! and again our cin said NO! irritating pests u know.... but what to do, who ask cin so attractive rite... hehe ;) my gosh, you know why eventful for cin? cos she's never got asked for her no. before and ya what's more she found it to be entertaining while i was having the jitters for her. no choice lar her attention span short, couldn't concentrate for more than 2 hours so ya... haha! but like i said for a more vivid description pls read cin's blog. that's all for now... see ya soon! |